LOOKING OUT FOR NUMBER ONE!

The biggest thing that has happened to me in my life is growing up to know what I want in life and to differentiate the good and not so good for me. I learn from my trials and tribulations and most of the time, I’ve learned to forgive myself and others. Everything I do is connected to real issues that women and men like me go through, sometimes life can be emotionally draining but it’s fulfilling. it gives me closure almost.

I think that strength is not beating myself up all the time and say okay; I’m beautiful some of the time. It’s a sense of vulnerability, I don’t mean letting someone walk all over me and beat me up or cheat on me. I mean surrendering to myself, so that I can have some freedom from myself. So no one can take away how I feel about myself. That’s the vulnerability I’m talking about.

I have realised my own power and realised I had power but as a human being, through my life I touched people that I had no idea it was so much deeper. I mean, people look at me as more than just a man who is living his life. It’s almost like a ministry who actually see me bigger than who I am. I found out its bigger than me, people actually come to me for help and to walk the talk.

Anyhow I feel no pressure at all because I am a human being and I will make mistakes. I cannot play this perfect person in peoples life’s and lie to myself because that would be fake. People would see that and I won’t be able to cope. I only feel pressure from myself. I’m going to make mistakes in my life, even in public. I’m probably the hardest on myself as I still want to be better than this version of myself. I don’t like some of the things I do. I don’t like the ugliness of some of the things that I’m trying to get out of my system. So the only pressure comes from me and that’s to be a better person.

I don’t think about what I want people to think of me when I leave the earth. I think about what I want people to think of me while I’m here, right here, right now is all I can think about and what I’d like to work on. What I want to show you is that there’s no man or woman who should make you feel good about yourself. You have to learn to do that for yourself and look out for number one.